coffee stains

Rejection can feel like a slap in the face no matter how brutally frank or subtle a person puts it across. As painful as the truth may be, the ultimate end in mind will be for the greater good. It may be the remedy to the pointless sleeplessness or to ease the burden of not knowing where you fit in someone’s universe. If there’s nothing to expect, there’s no better time but NOW to face reality and put an end to your misery. You will undoubtedly be freed from your captor in no time. I say indifference is the worst thing you can ever get out of the situation. A person who does not give a f*ck does not have any concern for your feelings. Maybe he’s torn, maybe he does not know what to say or do. Do not dwell on the what-ifs. Do not expect him to have a change of heart. We are only as good as the choices we make. Just move right along and never look back.

The hole he has pierced into my heart isn’t really that big yet the wound is deep and has been fresh for quite some time now. At times he would seem so distant. I would feel as though we are drifting apart. The neglect temporary easing me of the sting of unrequited feelings. I never had the chance to make much of it until it was right in my face. I prefer not to learn the truth first hand. Now that I can taste it, I realize that this is one of those endings that make you wish you could rewrite the plot. Perhaps change the characters and make the ending more agreeable. We never really get to redo our life's stories so we just learn to deal with the outcome of our actions. We get calloused and tend to think we will know better next time. Oh, really now?

Somebody had the weirdest notion that letting him know how i feel would liberate me from the bondage i have set upon myself. That seeing with own eyes that he would remain unmoved will give me the closure that i desired. Instead, I find myself exposed like a gaping wound, more vulnerable than ever. i got my answer--indifference is a thousandfold worse than feelings reciprocated or even rejection.